QRIMOLE – August 2023

It’s time for QRIMOLE! There’s a lot of places where you can ask questions to Kpopalypse but only one where you can ask really long-ass questions anonymously! So let’s take a look at this month’s (mostly) long-ass questions for Kpopalypse!

Hi Kpopalypse-seonsaengnim, Is Koyote the best coed kpop group? Are there other good coed kpop groups worth checking out? Stan Koyote!

I strongly recommend K-Tigers!

guys seem significantly more interested in me (a young woman) after I started dating another woman than while I was single, and significantly less interested when I dated men. Why do you think this is?

I suspect when they saw you with the guy they were like “she’s taken, never mind I guess” and when they saw you with the girl they were like “gosh maybe my threesome fantasy can come true”. I don’t know, just guessing. A lot of straight guys are really weird about fetishising lesbian activity. I never saw the point personally, as by definition it’s something I’m excluded from. I can’t speak for other guys and how they feel though.

ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ̀ˋ ————>

Cupid shot me right between the cheeks with his “arrow” when I stumbled across your site

———–> ε=ε=┏( >_<)┛

I tried to run from it since my doctor said, “No more arrows in the bum for you silly”

But I’d chew on your arrowhead any day, Kpoppy oppar *“~~~~

But first, before I make myself any hungrier:

A few Q’s that need (Ga’s, Gra’s, and) A’s ಠ‿↼

1.

You recently said:

“NewJeans remains that k-pop group creepily marketed at weirdos who own Macs, watch 70s porn “ironically” and buy vinyls that they don’t ever play”

Bby boi, you know me better than my meat knows the sour-cream-stuffed tube sock I’ve been hiding handy in my grandma’s opened casket the past 6 hours. Can’t wait to bounce from this boring ass wake.

(ツ)

Anyway, but as someone said, “vinyl records are the poor man’s art.”

What are some of your favorite album cover artworks? Mine is Buffalo’s “Only Want You for Your Body”

2.

I spent half a grand to go to the Pitchfork Music Festival. There were many duds but a couple blackswan artists stole the show.

K-pop vocalfags can only shiver in their vocalfaggy boots in the presences of

Charlotte Adigéry

And Soul Glo

Run vocalfaggy run!

-===≡≡≡( ͝° ͜ʖ͡°) ε=ε=ε=ε=(ノ*´Д｀)ノ

im gonna get ya!

Anyway, people are boring at festivals now. They don’t dance, sing along, or get possessed by spirits anymore

How do we MCDA (Make Concerts Dionysian Again)?

3.

(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄

Kpoppy oppa, when I asked “can I make an arrangement of ‘Show Me Love’” last month, I meant can I a write a demo for the song sung by Halcyon?

Also, can you make life imitate art and…..

(ΦзΦ)

…show me love….?

Just leave the money on the counter when you’re done

ಠ ‿↼

1. I think a lot of the 1980s 4AD artists had excellent cover art across the board (This Mortal Coil, Cocteau Twins, Dead Can Dance, Throwing Muses etc). One of the few record labels where there was a real aesthetic unity across the entire label’s product for a while. Although the opposite can be fun too, I do love that Buffalo album cover for its sheer tackiness actually, reminded me of The Mentors’ “Up The Dose“.

2. Good artist picks, I approve. Best live concerts I ever saw personally were by The Beastie Boys, I feel sorry for anyone who missed seeing them live. So more like that, I guess. Video doesn’t really capture how good they were, although this gets close-ish:

3. Sure, go for it. Would be interested to see a bunch of people do this, all without hearing anyone else do it prior. I wonder how different they would be.

Very good emojis this month. You are to emojis and QRIMOLE what Gfriending is to Roblox Little Angels Daycare. Please accept my

I’ve been noticing that JYP starts uploading Stage Practice of their artists (I only see Itzy and Nmixx, though). The videos seem to imply that their artists can perform the songs singing live. Even though I have no idea if there’s any alteration in the sound to make it more live.

Aside of you probably have an opinion about videos like that, I want to ask why the singing of member X is muffled/decreased whenever member Y singing right after it. Is it something common in live concert or such?

Thank you

The do sound realistically out of breath and pitch-inaccurate enough for it to actually be live. Singing while dancing at a k-pop level is hard. The difference in volume is just the different volume the girls are singing at. Some have stronger acoustic voices than others. Those discrepancies are evened out more when you get microphones involved (which is why on a practical performance level it doesn’t matter), but because here everything is just in the room, you can hear the varying projection in each person’s voice.

I really love your weekly insight on black music, which has introduced me to great music. Recently I find myself appreciating Afrobeats and sometimes I ask if you’ll enjoy such music or even listened to some of them, if not check them out and let me know what you think.

Never heard anything described as “afrobeat” that I actually liked. I welcome suggestions though.

What’s your fav hotpot ingredient?

I’m not much of a fan of hotpot but when I do have it I always go for as many different types of mushroom as possible. Also tofu.

Hi Kpopalypse,

I’ve been feeling angry, sad and dissapointed at recent events here. So a band called 1975 “performed” at a festival here a few days ago. However the singer (Matt Healy) spat at the audience, destroyed a drone, and even mentioned that he doesn’t want to perform. However the most fucked up thing is, he then went ahead and kissed his male bandmate. In an Islamic country. You can imagine how huge the backlash is. A lot of twitter and tiktok “activists” of course praised him. Yeah yeah fuck the homophobic government. But the truth is, that is such a white saviour performative activism in my eyes. What he did just cause the LGBTQ communities here even more oppresed and witch hunted. Some states with bigoted leaders even took this opportunity to ban concerts entirely. A lot of my friends in the LGBTQ community have speak out against that action, a lot of local activist are angry also. Just because of this asshole many years of their hardwork is down the drain. And even if we are ignoring the backlash to LGBTQ community, he caused the 3 days event to be cancelled entirely. So many people lost money and jobs. I’ve seen a lot of local small FnB businesses who are supposed to be vendors in the festival beg for people to come and buy their things because they are loosing a lot of money. It’s fucked up.

I don’t know what I really want to ask. I guess I just want to know is our anger justified? Do you have other perspective for point of view for this? Maybe in the big picture for LGBTQ activism this is nothing? Coz if Matt really is “standing up for LGBTQ community in Malaysia” why is he running away from Malaysia in a flight to Singapore at 4AM?

I’m really open to changin my mind about this. I know you have spoken before about activism so I’m curious what do you have to say about this.

Thank you!

Some years back I was visiting a friend’s house, and she’s a vegan, and I think veganism is fucking dumb. I happened to be eating something with meat in it, can’t remember what, and she said “can you please take the meat thing outside I don’t want dead animals consumed in my house thanks”. Now personally I think that’s fucking stupid, I mean the animal’s already fucking dead, and what difference does it make where I eat it, and as soon as I get outside the house I’m still going to eat the dead thing anyway, and she knows that, so there’s no logic to that kind of objection at all really. BUT – it’s her house, so as a friend I showed respect and went out her front door and devoured the dead animal flesh out on her front porch instead of inside the house, and then went back in after I was done. Sure it was an illogical request based on total bullshit but it also wasn’t any great imposition on my part to fulfill that request, so I did the nice thing, I’m not going to be a cunt just for the hell of it. Maybe if she were a total bitch I would have ate the animal in her kitchen just to spite her, but she’s not, she’s really cool actually, we just have different beliefs. So that’s how I view this 1975 situation. Sure that dude can kiss who he wants I guess and we can all agree that conservative religion can get fucked but really I don’t think it was too much of an ask for him to just shut up and play his songs and fuck off, I mean nobody’s at the concert specifically to see him get it on with his bandmate, it’s a rock concert not a gay sex show. I don’t like religious governments of any type but if I don’t live there it’s not really my fight – if I was in an Islamic country I’d personally just try to be nice and respectful and get along with the local laws and customs as best I could and hope nobody finds out about my evil satanic ways and wants to chop my head off. I hope this helps.

begging you to take a listen to sever the blight by hemlocke springs!!

Yeah it’s pretty good.

Dear Prudence, I mean, dear Kpopalypse:

I’m a lesbian. Since last year, I have been watching an anime show -completely devoid of fanservice and the usual misogyny- that involved its two female leads getting engaged in the very first episode, initially out of convenience, then falling in love for real, and then after ups and downs, lots of drama and the usual misunderstandings, finally getting lesbian married in the final episode. This was shown not with a kiss scene or a wedding scene, but by them wearing rings and a line mentioning a “sister-in-law”, thus making it as explicit as possible in a country like Japan where same gender marriage isn’t fully legal yet and in a show where the staff implied in social media that they faced a lot of obstacles to portray the relationship they wanted. This show was the latest entry in a 40 year old franchise and therefore had a lot of old and new fans watching but the main intention according to the staff was to bring new fans to the franchise (all of this will be relevant later).

Throughout the show’s airing every week during 9 months, quite a lot of homophobes were upset, annoyed, malding etc. and threw a tantrum all over social media, making certain websites like facebook essentially unusable. It’s worth mentioning however, that of all places, it was fucking 4chan that was surprisingly very supportive of the lesbian couple and fought off the homophobic trolls shitting up the threads. I know, I couldn’t believe it either, but I digress. I kept my cool, focused on the uplifting content and gay fanart, I severely limited my exposition to the hate by curating my follow list (I deleted my facebook 14 years ago), I asked myself WWKD aka “what would kpopalypse do?”, didn’t look at official hashtags etc. and I just laughed at their coping and seething, but a lot of homophobia did seep through and it really did start getting to me after a while.

When the show finally ended and the two leads got married, a lot of people internationally and domestically celebrated it as a win for LGBTQ rights, as this was an all ages mainstream show that aired sundays at 5:00 pm, not the usual sexist trash that airs at otaku o’ clock and is only watched by straight men who jerk off to “1000 year old” anime girls who look like children. Internationally it was seen as a landmark moment for diversity in anime, domestically japanese LGBTQ activists held it as a milestone in the ongoing struggle for gay rights in Japan.

I was happy, everybody was happy, haters were mad but no one cared, etc. up until last week when a voice actress from the show mentioned the two leads “getting married” in a printed magazine interview. That line got scrubbed from the digital version of the magazine and when the audience raised questions, the official show account doubled down by releasing a MHJ-tier statement, saying the “getting married” line was actually a mistake added by an anonymous editor and that the events of the show was actually meant to be “left up to interpretation”, essentially censoring the voice actress (it’s clear that she said what she said because these printed interviews are checked very rigurously so the editor thing is a lie)

Now, japanese is an ambiguous language where you have to read between the lines, but unfortunately both bilingual and japanese fans confirmed that the true intention of that statement was to essentially pander to the homophobic fans of the franchise and convince the audience that the gay marriage in the show, was, in fact, not gay, and not even a marriage. I mean, they’re just friends right?. The rings are just friendship rings. They will marry men later, preferably the male characters that the male audience can self-insert into. I mean it’s all left up to interpretation right? There’s people who unironically believe this now, and my twitter feed has been a total shitshow ever since. The statement has 10 million views and 6000+ quote retweets with people being angry in every language under the sun. Lots of people asking why, if the intention of the show was to attract new fans and the ending episode is as unambiguous about the lesbianism as Fiestar’s One More was about having a threesome. Many, many homophobes celebrating that a company bowed down to them. On the other hand, the LGBTQ fans of the show have been drawing fanart of the two leads getting married/celebrating their marriage/having married sex in retaliation. Even the girls who shipped the male characters of the show together have started coming out in support with their own lesbian fanart.

But in general, most people feel hurt to have been thrown down the bus in such a spectacular way. I am someone who preaches that we dykes should support other dyke singers/writers/programmers/animators instead of trusting mainstream companies, but even I was hurt. A lot of my friends are sad because it’s such a visceral reminder that LGBTQ people are Not Welcome, no matter how much money they throw at something.

Now one would ask: Why the fuck would you care about hateful comments and a display of homophobia from the producers of a fucking tv show? well, my response is that, it’s not about the tv show. It’s not about the characters, who aren’t real people. This isn’t like stanning a kpop group and being sad about kpopalypse dragging your bias’ music.

It’s about the fact that, internationally, across borders and languages, a large part of society and people *really fucking hate my guts for being a lesbian*. And holy shit do they hate us. Yes, I know that homophobia is global and systemic. Knowing it logically is one thing. But getting to face it and FEEL it viscerally and emotionally is something else, oppar. Anime is basically mainstream now and the community worldwide is gigantic. There was *so* much virulent hate and *so* much concentrated effort to ruin anything that was slightly positive or gay friendly about this fucking tv show, in several languages, not from dozens but thousands of people. It got to the point where we couldn’t vote for one of the characters of the show in a fucking stupid online twitter poll because homophobes botted the poll and filled the quote retweets with homophobic rhetoric and hate speech.

As stupid as that sounds, that was the moment where I was like, “damn, as a lesbian, I can’t even have a single fucking tv show, I can’t even have a stupid useless twitter poll, I can’t even enjoy this single piece of media without people constantly reminding me 24/7 in at least three different languages that I don’t deserve to exist and that I should be killed just for who I am”.

So yeah we are sad and mad, coping and seething. Personally I’ll probably move on from this pretty quickly and watch another (unambiguously) gay thing afterwards, but yeah. It’s not nice.

What would you advice? How do I stop letting the homophobia get to me, considering that, unlike you saying my bias’ music is shit, homophobia does kinda affect me personally and a lot of governments are moving against LGBTQ and especially trans rights (but they’re already moving against gay rights overall since that was always the intention)? I have actually touched grass since 2017 and have been involved in irl queer activism in my city till the present, but that’s another story for a future qrimole.
Sometimes I just want to relax watch gay shit on my tv ok?

PS: I know people are gonna ask what show it is, so the name is The Witch From Mercury. Start with the Prologue, which is available for free on youtube. Just be warned: you need a high IQ to watch it, because the events of the show… are up to interpretation

One of the problems with online existence is it’s the hate that gets boosted the loudest. I experience it also – when people like what I’m doing I get a few nice comments here and there but if I annoy a fandom or certain in-group I get literally hundreds of complaints. I’d think it dangerous to consider the hate representative, remember that toxic forces will deliberately boost the amount of vitriol just because it’s an online environment where they can get away with it, and they consider it in their best interests to boost the intensity of it as much as they can. You see this online a lot about all sorts of topics, on all ends of the spectrum. People say all sorts of stuff to me online that they’d never say to my face, I get all sorts of accusations on a daily basis, all over the Internet, but in person there is never any drama, nobody dares. That’s not to say the hate isn’t real, but it’s being artificially amplified, online life has a way of doing that. Also keep in mind there’s some visibility bias here – agitation speaks the loudest, while people who are unbothered by something tend to speak up less (example: you wouldn’t have posted this if you weren’t upset by the situation you’re in). So don’t go around thinking everyone hates you, or even the majority, it’s likely just a small subset of bad actors, amplified by the fact that the Internet makes it very easy for small subsets of bad actors to find and boost each other, something fringe groups tend to take advantage of.

King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard are probably the biggest Australian band in the world right now, especially among music nerds. What do you think about them? Also, can we get a new Stiglitz pic? Thank you!

Not really into KG&TLW, I think their “microtonal” ideas are interesting but ultimately wasted. Diatonic tonality is just too hardwired for their experiments to really work. Take that away and I don’t mind some of their heavier material I guess but I’d still rather listen to something else.

Stiglitz is a big fan of drinking water, and also of my partner’s shoes, so this photo combines two of her favourite interests.

Kpopalypse, have you ever had a friend have a crush on you?
I’m dealing right now with a someone who is clearly interested in me — even making hints towards wanting me to be in a polyamorous relationship with her and her girlfriend. We’ve known each other since high school and are now in our 20s.

At first when I realized I planned to just act normal. Now, I’m looking back on some of their behaviors (asking me favors to get me to go out with them, unwarranted compliments, liking my social media posts) and I’m honestly grossed out. I think it’s a feeling of betrayal? Like she’s persistent despite the fact that I’m clearly NOT interested in her and never will be.

What do I do in a situation like this?

I’m not very socially aware so I generally don’t even know when this is happening unless someone is being very obvious about it. In one case where this has happened, I actually said “fuck it” and dated her for a while because she was nice and I could, but she had to be REALLY obvious about it. Most of the time I only realised what was happening years after it was over and my dim brain finally put two and two together and thought “damn, I think she actually liked me, how did I miss that”. I guess that’s the positive side of missing a lot of social cues, you don’t really feel much pressure to act on coercion that you can’t even perceive. I guess what I’m trying to say is, I might not be the best person to answer this question, apologies.

Is there really such a thing as Kpop companies intentionally mistreating a group member by reducing their lines or blocking their opportunities, or are fans being delusional whenever they claim this?

Fan delusion. It’s not that the label is looking to shaft someone in particular, but if it’s a group with a shitload of members they can’t all be stars, so they watch to observe who hits it off with the public the most and focus their energies there, because why wouldn’t they. If it’s a ten member group and one or two members are blowing the fuck up on social media and live stages, why would you continue to invest equally in all twelve? It makes no sense. The “one big marketable star” who can be used to attract endorsements is the k-pop endgame, if companies are lucky enough to have someone on their roster who goes mega huge they will throw their weight behind that.

Hi from the Philippines. I always visit your site once a week for the Weekly Roundup and I anticipate your year-end best and worst Kpop songs every year. I’m not sure if someone already asked you this but can you tell us your process in creating those list? Is it like with your weekly review of new music, you save those music in a tentative list and give them a listen again nearing the end of each year or whatever music you remember as best/worst and them rank them? More power to your work and this blog keeps me grounded.

Salamat! Basically you are correct as that’s been the process in previous years, although this year I haven’t even started a shortlist yet, my current plan is to not even make one but just go through every roundup and nugu alert at the end of 2023 when I’m doing the tallying. Maintaining the shortlist is a lot of work and I’ve been really busy this year due to the rapidly worsening economy where I live making me have to work a lot more to get money, so I’m experimenting with this new method in the hope that it’s more time-efficient.

Hey Oppar!
I’ve got a crush on my teacher in my coaching Institute (Indian version of those Korean cram schools essentially) for one of the toughest competitive exams in my country. I have 3 hour classes with him 5 days a week and since it is a very important subject that has a lot of influence on my selection and rank and also a subject of my intrest I go after class to ask questions almost everyday and am usually one of the last to leave.These classes will go on till October at least and for a few weeks I’ll have 6 hours of classes with him.
He’s married and at the very least a decade older. I know it’s wrong so of course I don’t say anything inappropriate. I don’t know what to do about it ugh,at times I feel he almost knows because sometimes he tells me to ask my questions first although I usually dilly-dally.
I’ve always crushed on my teachers and profs,my type is people who I think are more intelligent and knowledgeable than me in fields I respect and will share said knowledge with my freely without being condescending and that often ends up being my educators. I also like acknowledgment of my own intellect that I often get from them and he’s nice to everyone but he especially praises my talents in private and also in company of other students. He’s sweet and I can’t help but seek his affirmations while I’m stuck with people who can’t say thank you or a word of praise or even acknowledgment at home.
What should I do Oppar? Of course I don’t want to persue him, how do I get over him?

While you’re in close proximity it’ll probably be a bit difficult to just easily forget him, but I think the best way to get over an old crush is to get a new crush. I’ve always had inappropriate crushes on people and my strategy is just to ride it out until I can find something to distract myself with, usually another crush, because it’s hard to go cold turkey but it’s a lot easier to switch the drugs you’re taking. You already know your type so let that be your guide, maybe you can find a crush that you also feel comfortable acting on.

Oppar!!! Check out why Sohee from ALICE is so popular. An underwear model! Wowww so hot, I am enjoying respectfully. Probably you saw this already but this was new to me.

Additionally I’m very pleased that Eunbi had her viral moment at Waterbomb. I have been a big fan of Eunbi since IZ*ONE and felt that her clothing choices were conservative and limiting. She deserves to go viral for being smokin’ and I’m happy to see her realizing her full potential. Will it extend to her next comeback? Who knows

I was shocked when the most recent Aespa comeback allowed Karina to wear skintight clothes. Given SM’s previous styling choices for her, it was quite an adjustment. Aespa has come a long way from the horrendous Black Mamba styling, thank goodness.

I’ve learned a lot from Kpopalypse fashion class, I used to think that Karina was as flat as Winter lol. Do you think more companies will dress their idols differently after seeing the success of these styling changes? I’m wondering if this a trend or just a random occasion where some more notable idols suddenly went more sexy. Regardless, I can say it has been a pretty good year for us objectification survey enjoyers.

I was aware of the Sohee underwear shoot but she was popular long before then. She only got that shoot in the first place because of her existing popularity in that area!

I think the image that idols portray is something that goes in cycles. Sex sells, but overt sex also turns a certain audience off and affects marketability especially in different regions of the world. Especially relevant given k-pop’s global reach these days, people in countries with rubbish ban-happy conservative governments like k-pop too. The goalposts on this type of thing are always moving.

what do you think of lovebites’ new bassist? just saw her live clip for the first time and personally im in love

Honestly a perfect choice. I was surprised that they picked Fami given that the sort of thing she’s known for is pretty far removed from Lovebites’ sound, but she fits right in and I love it that she looks like she’s having so much fun. So tired of overly serious metal people.

hi, i’m a relatively new reader who gets a good laugh out of your content every time i read. i was wondering if you are familiar with “lissa caonima,” who posts your work on tiktok? their account is how i found your site, and the comments on all of the posts are SO funny. my personal favorite is “@eddie :3: another flop opinion from the guy who calls himself the boob scientist”

and

Are you aware that there’s a tiktok account reposting your reviews? It’s @kpopalypsehottakes23

They claim they’re a fan acc but nevertheless they’re getting some traffic there and I think your blog should be linked in every video or you should create an account too, granted the audience there can be messy.

Due to the increased traffic it’s pretty funny to watch kpop fans’ zombie behavior, whenever you give “bad” reviews they would say you’re problematic or no one should take you seriously but they would eat up your “good” reviews any chance they get as if somehow that validate their favs.

I’ve been reading your blogs for years and this is my first time submitting Qrimole. I don’t have a matching music taste with you nor do I agree with everything you said but I appreciate posts where you disect the music industry. I used to be deep in fandom culture to the point of being delusional thinking my fav is the best and everyone is treating them unfairly causing them lots of hardships (the truth: their music kinda sucks – it also does not age well for me, haters/trolls are everywhere and not worth your emotional health, the group is earning millions and doing decently). I feel silly that I was stressed, but I guess that’s what the company want. They encourage such attachment bond to bring in panic purchases, sales, streams.

Your posts hepled give me a reality kick. Understanding the music business, knowing the buried truth, I’m seeing things as they are, pass the PR trick, the facade & emotional manipulation. I just enjoy music on my own, give support if I feel like it.

I also like the parts in your review where you point out something interesting on the technical side. I’m no professional so it’s fun to discover the background arrangement, the stylistic choices etc. I hope you can expand on that on your next reviews.

Keep up the spirit! Wish you good health and luck!

I’m very well aware of this account! It’s definitely a fan account and I appreciate what the creator does very much. I don’t really care that they don’t link because they do clearly credit and I know for a fact that their activity causes a lot of people to investigate my site. Of course half of those people are horrified from my dumping on their faves plus the stories they’ve heard (some true, some false, mostly just dumb) but I have faith that anyone with a functioning brain who actually investigates my site properly will “get it” eventually. I love all the comments on the site, even the ones from haters, but my favourite is Gfriending, she’s the Indonesian doll.

I do actually have my own TikTok account but I only use it to converse with the fans on hers. I have no plans to do my own TikTok videos at this point and even if I did, I don’t have the time to invest in making them look any good. I’m glad her account exists partially because people have finally stopped asking me to make my own TikTok as hers pretty much performs the kind of function that I would want an official account to anyway. Writing is really my thing, not being a social media person so the fact someone else is doing so well at it and clueing people into various parts of what I do – I think it’s great.

Glad I was able to help you with the fandom stuff! End of year reviews will go more in depth about the music, where appropriate/interesting.

Do you believe that aliens have regularly been visiting earth? I’m sceptical but open to the idea. I certainly believe that alien life exists in the universe, but I don’t think they would be like the aliens in popular culture. If these visits are really happening, it would create so much mayhem – especially with religious extremists – that countries or even the whole world could descend into complete chaos. I understand why governments would want to keep this information away from the public. However, I feel like we’re slowly being conditioned to accept that aliens are indeed visiting our planet. I’ve noticed that we’ve been getting little pieces of information every now and then over the years. It’s almost like they want to gradually condition us to accept this hypothesis as a fact so we don’t panic when a big reveal happens. What do you think?

I think this question dropped slightly before the latest UFO revelations, not sure. I don’t know anyway and I really can’t bring myself to give that much of a fuck. Whatever aliens are doing they don’t seem to be changing a whole lot as far as our general human trajectory goes so it’s hard to really see them as being that relevant. I still have to go to work and buy food and pay my bills, aliens aren’t changing this a whole lot. I think when we finally do get aliens in public or whatever I don’t think they’ll destroy us or save us, I think it’ll be a non-event personally. Maybe the odd preacher or politician or two will freak out but most people will jut be like “oh we have aliens now, that’s interesting I suppose” and then they’ll just get on with their day.

I recently watched Requiem for a Dream, and I wondered if you’ve watched it and what your opinion of its drug depiction is. I know that you have more experience with drugs than most due to your work in the music industry.

Yes, I’ve seen it. Accurate, especially with regards to heroin. I found the plot very predictable the first time I saw it, only because I know so many junkies and I know the path they go down, seen it many times, and the film very accurately portrayed how those things play out, so I was there thinking “if this film is realistic, x is going to happen in about five minutes” and sure enough it does. That’s not to say everyone who takes drugs goes into a doom-spiral like the people in the film, but when you combine potent drugs with disenfranchised people looking for attachment and something to fill a void in their lives, that’s always a dangerous combination. I especially like how the film juxtaposed addiction to prescription drugs and illegal drugs and showed how both can be damaging in similar ways. Not everyone is built for drug-taking, and while I generally advocate freedom of choice in these things, and agree that drugs do work well for some, I also think that if you can do without them, you should.

In your opinion whicn Genshin characters are sexiest?

I’m not that familiar with the roster of characters, although I do know Lisa and Sucrose quite well because my favourite x-rated cosplayers tend to pick those two all the time for their scenes. (JAV of the month SSIS-816 btw) If I can find one that can invert my mouse’s Y axis so I can actually play the fucking game, it can have my babies.

I’m secretly in therapy and my therapist told me it’s possible I have ADHD and anxiety. Her proposed methods for dealing with it haven’t worked well for me. It’s still very hard for me to focus even on things I like, let alone on studying (for a university major my parents pressured me into signing up for and now it’s too late to quit). My procrastination and inability to concentrate is all my mom has been talking to me about for a few months and it’s driving me crazy. I was doing okayish the first 2 years but maybe she realized I am falling behind. I had a breakdown a few days ago and my dad offered me a session with a psychologist. Immediately, my mom starts insulting psychologists. Her solution to my issues was to take my phone, force me to sit at the laptop with my room’s door open so she could keep an eye on me and asking me every 10 minutes if I’m focusing. This has been going on for half a week. Still can’t focus, I just zone out, daydream, spin in my chair, etc. I’ve managed to go through one presentation. Today, she scolded me for “not meeting my daily studying goals”, because I admitted I’m finding it hard to focus and didn’t revise an entire lesson as she wanted.
Another thing, her behaviour is confusing – she goes from annoyed to overly affectionate quickly and gives me hugs and kisses, which I HATE, have hated since childhood and she knows that very well. Why is she making me do that?
But worst of all, she’s not letting me get a job unrelated to the major. Idk if any company would want me, I would likely fail the interview. I’m not sure how I’ll graduate even, it seems impossible – next year I’ll have to complete an unpaid internship and have multiple missed exams and projects. My university lets people pay for another year or two to do the things they’ve missed or failed, but my parents have been clear they want me to graduate in the regular time frame. Btw It’s not even them paying, it’s my grandma.
I want to disappear, run away to the countryside to milk cows or something. Unfortunately in my country that’s basically a slow death from bad healthcare and stress. I’m lost and don’t know where to start sorting my shit out.

If you’re in therapy but you feel you still need QRIMOLE I don’t know whether to feel very flattered, or just mad at your therapist.

Since grandma’s paying, I think going to her for advise might be the best bet. Perhaps she can be more mature about it than your mother. Obviously your mother wants what’s best for you (and is probably overcompensating with the lovey-dovey thing because she knows her other treatment is upsetting you) but it’s also clear her methods don’t work. The way I see it is the boss is the one holding the cash so I’d explain the whole situation to her and see if she has any advice for how to handle your mother specifically. If you can get your mother to play ball here I feel like that’s half the battle. By the way I’ve long suspected that I have ADHD and I can’t focus on a damn thing longer than 30 seconds at a time, my solution for productivity is to make sure that my distractions are also productivity-related, so that way even when I go off-track I still get work done, and get it done by flitting between tasks rather than doubling down hugely on just one. When I write QRIMOLE I do it with lots of little distraction in between, but it’s all other stuff relating to my writing etc. Also don’t be too hardcore on yourself, it’s okay to let your mind drift sometimes. Just keep a mental (or maybe physical) note of where you left off so you can come back to it. So what I’m saying is that having ADD brain doesn’t mean you’re screwed, I passed my uni degree in the top ten percentile while I was ADD and miserable as hell on top of that. The trick isn’t to overcome the illness but to find a way to work with it.

Also if you’re in therapy don’t forget to be honest with your therapist about what’s not working. If she can’t help, change therapists – some have different methods.

Jesus H bro you finished the second Hana book in four months? Very impressive, congratulations on your speed. I look forward to reading it. Also see Hana turned twenty in the new art. Oh speaking of books I got a copy of the new BTS one, if you want it and don’t have it by the time you read this, let me know and I’ll send it over.

…oh yeah and also I wrote a book in four months. You can do it.

Hana benefits from a very good stylist and makeup artist, who plays a slightly bigger role in the second book…

I have an e-copy of the BTS book, thanks!

Have managed to convert one of my non kpop friends to kpop via KARA, Dreamcatcher, Infinite and SHINee XD hope you;re doing well kpopalypse sir

Good work, caonima!

Why do you think Punch so completely inverses the rule of OST songs being shit (and why her normal songs are actually shit)? It makes no sense to me that all that effort would be put into random songs no one would normally hear.

No idea. I guess she just teams up with a particular songwriter or production team for the OST stuff who really know their shit.

hello friend shape!!! i am here to ask you for advice on something i’ve been thinking about lately.

i got into kpop around june 2022, and since then, i’ve been really pushing it forward in my life. posters on the walls, albums on the shelves, the whole nine yards. i play kpop songs in the car for my family, even. some of this has been bleeding out into my interactions with music lovers who don’t really enjoy kpop. i have a friend who works as a child psychologist and happens to run a music discord on the side, and i’ve become really close with him over the past two years. since he seems to be interested, i’ve been regularly messaging him about anything kpop-related that i consider interesting (recent topics include the produce series and the way that westerners engage with maknaes in groups), and he’s been suggesting that i. write a book about kpop.

i’m REALLY not qualified to write a book, and i don’t think i actually make sociocultural analyses of kpop in a way that would interest readers (regardless of what kind of background they come from). he’s telling me i’ve been doing some sort of research with the information i’m sending to him, but i don’t. really think i have been? i’ve also found that a lot of my opinions about kpop groups and even the music itself differ from the typical ones, and i don’t really want to get a lot of hate on my back for attempting to publish a poor attempt at diving into the kpop realm. i feel like my friend is suggesting that i write specifically for an audience that would be interested from a sociology perspective, which is sort of daunting. i’m really not trying to down on myself here, but there’s only so much that an 18yo with no formal academic training can do when it comes to kpop analysis, and frankly, there are probably already people out there doing it better than i ever could.

i want to know if you think it’s worth pursuing, even if nothing ever comes of it? i know you have published your own kpop book (TWO BOOKS, CONGRATULATIONS!!!!), even if it’s not the same kind that my friend is thinking about. i do enjoy talking about kpop, clearly, and it’s a lot of fun to share it with my friend, but would writing about it take away the fun part? did you ever feel similarly? are there any more difficult topics to talk about on your blog due to personal bias?

thank u for reading, and thank u for bringing me lots of Laughter in the world of kpop fans who make it hard for me 2 remember why i like the genre in the first place

As far as writing a book goes, I think only do it if you’re very passionately wanting to do it. Especially for a non-fiction book, the pressure is on because the stuff you write about needs to be unassailable, as it will be picked apart and dissected by readers a lot. You’ll need a lot of passion for writing to get you through the hundreds of hours of slog that accurately researching topics will be, especially in the k-pop realm where it’s so hard to research because the truth is so often obfuscated by social media noise, marketing hype, and the k-pop machine’s fundamentally dishonest way of presenting itself as all sunshine and roses. If you write the book well, you’ll anger a lot of deeply invested people, as well as potentially some “external forces” (as I’ve done from time to time) so also be prepared for that. On the other hand, it probably is a good idea… but if you were going to do it, I’d encourage you to hone your writing on smaller projects first, just to get a feel for writing. Doing a degree in a writing-related field will possibly help (just once again, pick your passion so you have the stamina to get through it). Also practice writing I would have had difficulty writing a decent book had I not written fanfictions for a decade before that.

On the other hand if you don’t feel like it, just don’t. No harm in not going there, and yes there will be others writing those kinds of books. But if you do it, don’t do it to please him, or me, or because of any other expectations. Make sure that it’s something that you want. Because writing is a lot of work to do well and there’s no point putting in all that energy for something that isn’t to your benefit.

This June I turned another year closer to 50 than the majority of your readers, and I can’t help but think as I leave middle age and become AN OLD PERSON that I’ve missed out on quite a bit of life. I know that very few of us ever truly realize our dreams and live the life we’ve imagined, but when I was younger I dreamed of writing The Great Novel. Now I push paper for the government and depression has robbed me of the joy I used to have in writing. I want to approach my “golden years” as being full of possibility and not regret. But I don’t know where to start. What do you think, kpopalypse guru sir?

Also, to keep this kpop related, while reading through some of your older posts I was pleasantly surprised to see that you bias Dami of Dreamcatcher. You have impeccable taste. What is it about Dami that makes you bias her?

I have to do an updated bias list soon so I might go into more detail there. Coming soon.

Plenty of time left on the clock BUT that’s no reason to act like it. I never had any aspirations to write a novel, or anything else for that matter other than make music and hopefully not have to work for a living one day (still working on that last one), I just thought on the spur of the moment one day “hey perhaps a novel would be a good idea because fuck it, why not, if Jessica can do it why can’t I…”. Depression can really suck, I suffered from it a lot when I was younger but now I’m an old fuck myself I’ve managed to tame the depression to a very dull roar right at the back of my mind – I can still tap into it if I need to (for creativity etc) but it doesn’t dominate my life like it did in my teens and twenties. I find the best way to combat depression is creativity, if I’m really down I’ll do something creative or clever (or at least that I think is creative and clever, regardless of if others do) and funnel the bad feelings into that. So just find something, doesn’t have to be anything big or major, just start small and do something cool that you can be proud of. Then once that’s done, think of what else you can do and how you can keep the buzz going, and see where it leads. Rather than using depression to sabotage your writing, use writing to sabotage your depression (still see a doc though if you haven’t – ultimately I still got more help there than from writing).

I like this song, it sounds like the punk formula applied and done well, I want to find something similar, but I genuinly don’t know where to start. I don’t think the ramones, sex pistols, the clash sound like this. But some british dude on meth should have perfected the sound years ago right? Do you know where to start, any band names to recommend?

They’re kind of giving you a clue there with that song title – the song is clearly inspired by 70s proto-punk rockers like The Stooges, MC5, New York Dolls etc. – can’t say it’s a sound I really like but it’s definitely the area that they’re exploring, so I’d start by checking out those groups.

There is a concerned minority of fans who want to push broadcasting companies to invest in more accurate picture cameras that aren’t widened by x1.2 or whatever the current dimensions are. This is because idols have to have insane diets to look good on camera when in real life they’re so much skinnier than what you can see. How feasible is this idea? Could this be implemented? It would really change a lot of things about broadcasting if companies have to switch out ALL of their cameras lmao, but it is certainly something to think about.

That type of concern is informed by a fundamental misunderstanding of how cameras work. I won’t go into the technical details here of why cameras make people really look fat but nobody’s widening things by a certain fixed ratio, the camera just distorts because of the physical properties of lenses. The real solution isn’t to change out the hardware, which wouldn’t help all that much, it’s to change people’s attitudes so they are healthier about seeing physical images. Something that this website is very committed to doing, by the way, in case people haven’t noticed yet.

I feel like NMIXX’s concept is pretty good, despite their actual music output at the moment. I didn’t think a mix-up concept could work well until I heard the Eurovision 2023 Finland entry (Cha Cha Cha by Kaarija), which switches musical genres half way through so seemlessly from this heavy screaming club song to something delightfully fun and happy. It’s insane how well Cha Cha Cha pulled that off, and NMIXX could be on the pinnacle of greatness here.

Speaking of, Eurovision = Kpop, in the same levels of campiness.

That’s it. No question here. I just wanted to rant on this. But do you watch Eurovision, kpopalypse oppar?

I don’t watch Eurovision, although inevitably people always link me the songs and ask me about them so I always end up feeling like I’ve watched it.

Do you think international interest in kpop will ever decline? If so, when?\

Not in the near future. Long term it may start declining as the population of Korea declines. The only other thing that could radically change things is a change of government to something ultra-weird that doesn’t want to play ball with the music industry anymore, but I don’t really see that on the horizon.

hi kpopalypse! this is the 4th and final installment of “my parents are homophobic and i need help”. Unfortunately this will almost all have to be private since it’s such specific information. Brackets for privacy.

[stuff removed at reader request]

Ugh…trust me kpopalypse, being straight is much easier than dealing with all of this.

It’s always a win-win to find out where you stand. Not only does it makes it easier to move on, but now you know what you’re dealing with, and can make some choices. By all means keep the friendship if you think it’s valuable to keep, she seems cool so why not? As long as you can handle it, it’s probably a good idea. Also you don’t know what can stem from it. If this girl is getting the bisexual comments often, then there’s a good chance her circle of friends includes people you might be into. I have a sneaking suspicion that her dropping the sexuality truth bomb wasn’t as inadvertent as it might have seemed, so don’t be surprised that if you keep the friendship up, she starts very subtly helping you out a bit…

just wanna tell you im a big rupauls drag race fan and everytime i watch the show they mention the word CUNT ( it means Carisma, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent) i just remember your blog. thanks for being a great cunt, cunt

Thanks, cunt!

Are friends really that necessary in life?

He who has many friends, has no friends. However he who has no friends, also has no friends. Friends aren’t necessary, but neither is T-ara. However that doesn’t mean a copy of Absolute First Album can’t enhance your life.

if i ever get famous one day can i quote you as my role model

Sure! Not sure if I’m the best role model given that I’m basically an asshole but go right ahead you have my permission.

would you rather listen to a metal guitar solo but it’s played on a harmonica, or a children’s nursery rhyme played on electric guitar

Nursery rhyme!

NEWJEANS QUESTION DUMPING GROUND (UGH)

ADOR have really got you all by the balls haven’t they. I guess Min Heejin’s marketing works.

Hi oppar! I’m the person who asked this and figured asking here instead would be better. What do you mean with “aesthetics” in this case? Is it really just the surface details of how particular details are placed in an image or video, or is it something else? (I don’t mean it in the zoomer way, of course.)
To elaborate on my previous question, I was thinking about the Whitehouse song and how it applies to NewJeans specifically, but I don’t see it as meaningfully very different from other K-Pop groups. The packaging is surely different, but packaging is easily interchangeable – see all the groups currently copying the Ditto look. Unless making people think the package is interchangeable *is* part of the product being sold…? Or unless I’m completely missing the point idk
Anyways, sorry for asking this question for the 732032932th time (but not really), feel free to tell me to fuck off instead. Thank you in advance!

So for readability I’ll just screencap the starting point for this thing:

The reason why I tend to bring up Whitehouse (the ‘power electronics’ group) when NewJeans come up is because Whitehouse were especially in their latter stages of existence very adept at calling out the specific type of fetishisation that people like Min Heejin engage with. Specifically, putting a barrier between the creator and concepts like “girls inviting people over to their house for a metaphorical cookie“, or “face to face true love vulnerability confessional” or “scantily clad nymphs dipping in the pool” etc etc by adding a veneer of “it’s a deep artistic commentary, it’s not what you think, how could you possibly think that, look how deep this is” over the top to pre-emptively deflect criticism.

Now here’s the thing, the idea that NewJeans’ statement is artistic and deep is actually not a lie. There in fact IS very valid and interesting commentary in a lot of Min Heejin’s work that focuses on the condition of the relationship between fans and idols, the artifice of the idol world is definitely a theme that she’s presenting, and quite successfully. She’s legitimately good at what she does, which is why she’s shining so much more now with it than when she was under SM’s wing and probably had her creative impulses more curtailed by “outside forces” (don’t you love ’em). The following video breaks down one example of Min Hee Jin in action very clearly, if you get past the cringe fawning over the product itself, the observations made here are absolutely correct. It’s not even that different to a lot of the stuff I’m saying with my own material, like my novels, fanfictions, various observations on the state of idols in roundup and elsewhere.

So when a burned-from-criticism Min Heejin snaps back with a dry insult that suggests her critics aren’t grasping the whole picture, that’s not a complete lie either. She’s smart and she’s making a complex statement that’s worthy of attention. My problem is that her quite valid creative statements are being explored with underage performers being crammed into too-adult “healthy porn for men” style concepts. It’s not the message I have a problem with, it’s the medium of that message. Two things can be true at the same time. Min Heejin can be a very talented creative director making some very clever art concepts that raise interesting questions about the idol/fan relationship, and she can also have a creepy obsession with pursuing an aesthetic guided by fetishisation of very young people and using that as her paintbrush. I mean, would it have really killed her to use people a little bit older for a concept like “Cookie”? So when I read her defenses and those of NewJeans fans, I tend to think of this:

You don’t even need to listen to the song (and I doubt many of you would want to) – the album cover in the thumbnail is what I want people to pay attention to. I could put that text in a roundup review for almost any NewJeans song and it would fit perfectly.

What are your thoughts on the current trend of short (under 3:00, sometimes even under 2:30) k-pop songs? I have a feeling your answer will be something like “I’d rather listen to two and a half minutes of great music than three and a half minutes of shit,” but I wonder if you agree with me that some songs these days seem unfinished because the companies are so focused on making their music TikTok-friendly. A good example, at least in my opinion, is NewJeans’ “ETA.” I don’t mind a 2:30 song that feels complete at that length, but “ETA” just doesn’t. The outro sounds like it should be a bridge and makes me expect a third chorus, but then the song is over! And I want it to keep going, because it’s a good song! Maybe I’m just old, idk.

(Also, how creepy is the “Cool With You” performance video in which the girls are dancing in front of a painting of a naked Cupid and Psyche?)

Short songs: I’m fine with it. Short songs don’t overstay their welcome, better too little than too much. NewJeans’ songs are quite simple musically (it tends to be one mantra-like series of riffs that goes around and around, for better or worse) and so the short length feels right. I’ll take it over generic high-note climaxes and post-chorus drops.

Interestingly, this trend isn’t new. In the 1950s the average pop song barely touched three minutes, sometimes barely two, it was only in the 1960s when longer form pop songs became a bit more popular. So perhaps you’re simultaneously too old and not old enough?

Imagery in their dance videos… well it’s Min Heejin so what do you expect I guess.

Hi Kpopalypse,

NewJeans new EP doesn’t have any song longer than 3 minutes, but I never feel their songs are “incomplete” or “shortened”. It has enough “loops” or “refrain” to me that I begin to think is this have to do with the structure of the songs?

That’s because each song doesn’t actually contain that much music. By making a shorter song quicker and more repetitious, it feels longer.

Listening to NewJeans become like a mini-torture because they all-vibes but never really use the melody to the full potential imo (their newest EP doesn’t have song over 2:40). I know the producer said that the references is from 90’s/00’s music but is there any (or at least your recommendation) song that may inspire the group’s music but with longer duration?

The really fast beats with very light, frequency-sparse percussion sounds reminds me of So Solid Crew, so let’s end on a positive note and a good song after all this miserable whining because Kpopalypse is all about being POSITIVE after all.

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That’s all for this episode of QRIMOLE! This series will return next month! In the meantime remember to play nice in the moshpit!

Oh, and do you have a question that you’d like to see answered in the next episode of QRIMOLE? If so, use the question box below, or if no box appears, click the Qri on the sidebar to open the box as a separate webpage! Kpopalypse will return!